PARENTING & MANAGING

Parenting and management share a number of key similarities: both demand significant effort, a mindset geared toward continuous learning and improvement, and the ability to navigate the unexpected with ease.

In the next paragraphs, I will share my two cents on how I face these two ultra-tough missions.

Parenting & managing, why did I create this link?

A good friend once said to me, “When you have one child, you’re just a parent, but when you have more than one, you become a family.” This simple yet profound insight instantly captivated me, revealing the deep truth behind those words.

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“When you have one kid, you are a parent; when you have more than one kid, you are a family”

– A dear friend

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It has been a year since my role as a parent expanded from having one child to juggling two little rascals. Similarly, it has been over two years since the Experience Design Team (XDT) at Vorwerk International saw an increase in team size. As a result, it feels quite fitting to draw parallels between my experiences as a father—first with one child and now with two—and my journey as a manager overseeing a growing group of talented designers.

I was taken aback by how many overlaps and common patterns I found in both experiences. With each observation and reflection on various episodes, dynamics, and behaviors, I began to see clear connections between my journey as a parent and my role as the Global Head of Experience Design at Vorwerk International.

The state-of-art of my parenting and managing missions

Since the 20th of February 2024, the day my second child, Zeno, arrived, I’ve found myself juggling two demanding roles: co-managing a family of four and leading a talented group of designers. This dual responsibility isn’t entirely new for me. Not long ago, I delved into the parallels between parenting and design thinking, and now, life has allowed me to navigate the sweet spot between raising kids and guiding creative minds.

As a parent, I’ve had to navigate the diverse opinions of my parents, my in-laws, and other parents, all while juggling the complexities of raising two kids alongside my journey. I appreciate their suggestions and insights and recognise the value of making mistakes and learning from them as quickly as possible.

As a designer and a manager, I feel fortunate to work alongside exceptional colleagues and have access to insightful managers in my business settings and professional network. These connections have provided invaluable feedback regarding their experiences with me, helping me understand my strengths and weaknesses in managing and leading talent. Simultaneously, I’ve undertaken a similar process with my kids: reflecting on my management of the Experience Design Team at Vorwerk International and learning from my past mistakes.

My strategy to navigate the parenting & managing missions

Building on these two exercises changed my perspective and helped me to get a fresh start on connecting the dots and taking valuable actions.

1. Empathy in parenting and managing
   I’ve realised that empathetic observation enhances my understanding of my children’s unique personalities and needs. It all begins with active listening, which allows me to pick up on details that help define specific behaviors.
   
   I apply this same approach when interacting with the XDT. I pay attention to the behaviors and situations that lead to both unexpected positive outcomes and less favorable ones. By sharing my insights, I encourage my teammates to express their thoughts, fostering improvement in our next iteration.
2. Delegation and trust
   Delegation plays a significant role in my journey as a parent and a manager, requiring ongoing practice and development.
   
   In parenting and team management, delegating and building trust are essential for fostering independence and self-confidence. By allowing children to take on new responsibilities, I empower them to face challenges and learn from their experiences, which nurtures a strong sense of accomplishment.
   
   The same principle applies to managing teams—when I hand over tasks to team members, it demonstrates my confidence in their skills and encourages them to take ownership of their work. For the XDT, the delegation plan that our team crafted marked a significant shift in how we define our workflow and interactions. I’ve noticed that clearly outlining roles and expectations boosts productivity and morale. Trust is cultivated when I step back after delegating, allowing team members to make decisions while remaining available for guidance.
3. Support and authority
   Striking a balance between support and authority is crucial in parenting and management.
   
   As a parent, it’s essential to guide and set clear boundaries so children can understand their limits and expectations. I’ve noticed that when support and authority are in harmony, it nurtures growth, allowing children to feel secure while having the freedom to explore their world.
   
   In managing the XDT, offering support means being accessible, providing the necessary resources, and fostering an environment of openness. The more I immerse myself in my leadership position, the more I realise that authority creates a framework where creativity and innovation can thrive without stifling control.
   
   In family life and with the XDT, I focus on cultivating a culture of mutual respect and shared objectives by promoting open communication and being approachable. My anticipated return on investment is that this balance will help the children understand their roles within the family while empowering the talents within the XDT to flourish in alignment with the team’s goals and values.

Innovative(?) and Creative(?) Parenting & Managing Techniques

1. Identifying Emotional Cues:
   By observing children closely, I can pick up on subtle emotional cues that indicate how my child is feeling. This can help them respond appropriately to their emotional needs, fostering better communication and emotional intelligence. Like my teammates, I invest in becoming better at reading the room and figuring out when it’s the right time to push on the accelerator and when it’s time to give a break.
2. User Behavior Analysis and feedback integration:
   As a designer, I observe users interacting with products to gain insights into usability and functionality. This type of observation helps identify pain points and areas for improvement, leading to more intuitive and user-friendly design solutions. The same loop applies to kids and fellow designers. In that case, the product is my parenting and managing style. It’s a continuous improvement job that requires constant fine-tuning, given the complex environments in which we live. Plus, feedback integration is critical to observing how kids and fellow designers adapt to changes. Similar to the previous points, learning how to receive and give feedback is a tiring task that adds additional effort on top of the day-to-day fatigue, and it requires patience because the results are mainly on a long-term perspective.
3. Observing Play/Work Routines and Interactions 
   As a parent, I find that watching my children play and engage with their surroundings is a fantastic way to learn. This kind of observation unveils their interests, strengths, and areas where they could use extra support. As a design manager, I apply the same approach to shape plans that cater to each talent’s unique needs, avoiding the trap of imposing preconceived expectations.

Bringing It Together

I’m committed to continually learning how to juggle my parent and manager roles. I’m eager to enhance my ability to empathise and foster responsive environments. As part of this ambitious journey, I find mindful observation a valuable tool that helps me understand and meet various needs, ultimately promoting growth and satisfaction in both areas.

When it comes to parenting, leveraging empathy and mindful observation helps create a nurturing atmosphere where my children feel supported and understood. By tuning into their emotions, needs, and challenges, I can tailor my approach to guide them effectively. This encourages a safe space for their growth and development, instilling a sense of security and belonging.

In my role as a manager, I apply these same skills to my team, enabling us to deliver experiences that align with business objectives while also addressing the needs of my team members. By observing the dynamics and challenges within the group, I can offer the right support, fostering creativity, collaboration, and effective problem-solving. This cultivates a connection where team members feel valued and empowered, leading to design outcomes that unlock genuine business value.

The three Books that inspired me to write about the link between parenting and managing

1. “The 5 Love Languages of Children: The Secret to Loving Children Effectively” by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell – While focused on parenting, this book’s insights into communication and understanding can also be applied to managing teams.
2. “Mind in the Making: The Seven Essential Life Skills Every Child Needs” by Ellen Galinsky – This book connects child development with essential skills needed for successful leadership and management.
3. “Raising Resilient Children: Fostering Strength, Hope, and Optimism in Your Child” by Robert Brooks and Sam Goldstein – Though focused on children, the lessons on fostering resilience and confidence are highly applicable to managing diverse teams.